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License to ill - Ldy, the lemony, ligerish ducttaparian's Magic Treehouse of Lost Thoughts
A classy broad's life... with footnotes.
ldy
ldy
License to ill
I have just made The World's Worst Guacamole.

It looks just like hummus and tastes almost (but not quite) entirely unlike... food.

Unripened avacadoes, awaaaaaaaay!!

I shall put it on the table and see if it gets et. Because I love my family. And because it's funny.

Tags:
I'm feeling all kinds of: unproductive produce!
What I hear: Jethro Tull, in my head

9 tall tales or Tell me a story
Comments
scottique From: scottique Date: September 26th, 2006 12:47 am (UTC) (permalink)
YOU CRACK ME UP. :-D
ldy From: ldy Date: September 26th, 2006 01:02 am (UTC) (permalink)
YAY! <3 <3 <3
petermarcus From: petermarcus Date: September 26th, 2006 01:49 am (UTC) (permalink)
Garlic powder, salt, and lemon juice covers a multitude of sins when it comes to guacamole. How did you make it so that you thought it was so bad?
ldy From: ldy Date: September 26th, 2006 02:05 am (UTC) (permalink)
Sadly, even garlic, salt and fresh lime juice (and tomato and jalapeno) won't rescue avacadoes that taste like CCAAAAAARRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAP. They were just icky bitter. If I'd let them ripen a few days, maybe I could have had a nice dishy dish. I even got two kinds... but both just tasted terrible.

I really hate our produce section sometimes (such as it is).

I'll pop back there tomorrow and pick up a couple more, and give them a few days to ripen this time :)
petermarcus From: petermarcus Date: September 26th, 2006 04:11 am (UTC) (permalink)
The real secret of avacados is to shake them. If you can hear the seed rattling in the center, then they're ready. This somewhat depends on the species of avocado (sometimes, the rattle is almost a preternatural instinct, and sometimes, it jumps out of your hand).

In any case, time works well, and don't stick them in the fridge.
sirenity From: sirenity Date: September 26th, 2006 07:19 am (UTC) (permalink)
What great advice! I never knew that.

I know it wasn't for me but I'm gonna remember that next time I buy avacados - Hey, thanks. =)
ldy From: ldy Date: September 26th, 2006 02:00 pm (UTC) (permalink)
It's funny... the seed in the big one did rattle slightly, but the sucker was as hard as a rock. I usually go by smell... and these didn't have any (not a good sign). Oh, well!

Thanks for the advice! :)
sirenity From: sirenity Date: September 26th, 2006 07:20 am (UTC) (permalink)
I hope the machaca came out to your liking!
ldy From: ldy Date: September 26th, 2006 02:01 pm (UTC) (permalink)
The machaca was awesome! I bought a pound and a half, figuring I'd have a little left to freeze... but every bite of it got gobbled up! :D
9 tall tales or Tell me a story