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Lotus Touts - Ldy, the lemony, ligerish ducttaparian's Magic Treehouse of Lost Thoughts
A classy broad's life... with footnotes.
ldy
ldy
Lotus Touts
As a rule, I don't do email forwards. I just don't. Surprisingly, I've noticed no negative impact in my luck, lovelife, or financial situation due to this.

I'm not making exception to my adherence to this rule... but I will share one I received today with you, just because I think it's Damned Good Advice and deserves a read (and perhaps a re-read, since it's an oldie-but-goodie) :)

Don't worry; I don't do this often. Stikeouts, links, footnotes, and commentary at bottom are mine.
Lotus Touts: You have 6 minutes

There's some mighty fine advice in these words, even if you're not superstitious. This Lotus Touts has been sent To you for good luck from the Anthony Robbins organization. It has been sent around the world ten times so far.1

Do not keep this message.

The Lotus Touts must leave your hands in 6 MINUTES. Otherwise you will get a very unpleasant surprise. This is true, even if you are not superstitious, agnostic, or otherwise faith impaired.2

ONE: Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO: Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

THREE: Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR: When you say, "I love you," mean it.

FIVE: When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.

SIX: Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN: Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT: Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

NINE: Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.

TEN: In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN: Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE: Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN: When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"

FOURTEEN: Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

FIFTEEN: Say "bless you" or "gesundheit" when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN: When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

SEVENTEEN: Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN: Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN: When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY: Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

TWENTY-ONE: Spend some time alone.

Now, here's the FUN part!
Send this to at least 5 people and your life will improve.
1-4 people: Your life will improve slightly.
5-9 people: Your life will improve to your liking.
9-14 people: You will have at least 5 surprises in the next 3 weeks.
15 and above: Your life will improve drastically and everything you ever dreamed of will begin to take shape.


A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.3 Do not keep this message

Practice all of the above consistently, and I wouldn't be surprised if you do find that your life improves drastically and everything you ever dreamed of begins to take shape.

Keep this message. Share as you see fit. :)

1 There's no way to know this! Furthermore, I see no evidence that supports its supposed association with the Anthony Robbins Foundation. It's still good advice, nonetheless.

2 While it's statistically likely that you will experience an unpleasant surprise of some sort at some point in the future, it is no more likely to happen due to your actions in regard to this particular piece of information.

3 No, that would be a heart surgeon. Friends don't let friends OCM, except in very specific and life-threatening circumstances. Chances are, you will never have to touch another person's heart, regardless of your relationship.

4 TWENTY-TWO: Learn to love yourself unconditionally. It is the key to life, and the key to loving others.

5 TWENTY-THREE: Laugh. The universe is inherently funny.

I'm feeling all kinds of: My six minutes were up some time ago
What I hear: Fans humming smoothly

4 tall tales or Tell me a story
Comments
gev From: gev Date: January 30th, 2005 12:43 am (UTC) (permalink)

great list

I've seen something similar before.
I like the spelled out numbers, instead of digits.
number twenty-three is very much like point
ten of gentleeleos' list, and I *so* agree.
duinlas From: duinlas Date: January 30th, 2005 12:53 am (UTC) (permalink)
BUT WHAT IF YOU DO KUNG FU AND HAVE TO PUNCH THROUGH SOMEONE'S HEART???????
chezmax From: chezmax Date: January 30th, 2005 01:26 am (UTC) (permalink)
You should've linked Bless You to yesterday's Penny Arcade.
zebra From: zebra Date: January 30th, 2005 03:08 am (UTC) (permalink)
TWENTY-FOUR: Avoid if at all possible taking a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. ;)
4 tall tales or Tell me a story