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And she wished with all her heart that she were elsewhere - Ldy, the lemony, ligerish ducttaparian's Magic Treehouse of Lost Thoughts
A classy broad's life... with footnotes.
And she wished with all her heart that she were elsewhere
So I was miserable all day yesterday. I had so much on my mind... I suppose the stress of everything had just gotten to me.

I talked w/ P about it for awhile, and while it was good to get a couple things off my chest, it didn't really solve anything. I got off the phone feeling nauseous, and promptly ran upstairs and got sick.

It was after 3 pm, and I hadn't eaten all day. Truth is, I had no appetite whatsoever. But knowing that I had a show later that evening and would need the energy, I fixed myself up a bowl of cereal. It didn't appeal. Two bites later, and I just couldn't eat anymore.

I went to lie down for awhile. I didn't set the alarm, and knew that I had to get up for the show, so I didn't really sleep deeply or anything. But I dozed. I got up with half an hour before I had to leave for the show. I was beginning to feel rather better.

I brushed my teeth, looked up and AAAAAAAGHGHGHGH! Despite my best efforts, half my hair was sticking straight up. Eville bedhead! So I showered again.

And felt nauseous again.

And began to get an awful headache.

But I got my act together as best I could and drove to the show. And that's when I realized what, precisely, was wrong.

Tail-lights shone with the intensity of a thousand suns. My engine sounded like a freight train. My vision was doing acrobatics; something which should never, ever, happen to someone behind the wheel of a car.

I had developed a full-blown migraine.

This is quite a rarity in my world, thank heavens. Maybe once or twice a year I'll mistakenly eat some MSG or something (I'm dreadfully allergic) and get a migraine from that. Usually I know what I've eaten within minutes of ingesting it, and be able to rid myself of it before too much damage is done.

But a migraine caused by something else? One that can't in any way be traced back to MSG? Very rare. Maybe once every two or three years I'll get hit with one of those.

I have never, ever, had one this bad.

I had to keep going. As they say, The Show Must Go On.

But I fervently wished that it wouldn't.

I finally got to the theater. Two actors were there already, shouting at the tops of their lungs. Or perhaps they were speaking normally. It was impossible for me to tell. I excused my sorry self and collapsed on the upstairs couch.

I could hear traffic three blocks away. I could smell things in that dirty old couch that were probably ground-in ten years past-- things I had (thankfully) never smelled before The low lighting in the room was bright enough to shine through my eyelids and pierce my very brain-- a brain which was evidently, by the feel of it, being eaten by angry gremlins from the inside out.

If it weren't for the gremlins, I could have made a keen superhero. Hark it is I, SuperSenso! Brain-eating and stomach-eating gremlins, however, are too great of disability to account for such weak powers, I think.

But, anyway, as I was saying, The Show Must Go On. So I did my makeup (fat lot of help that was!) and dressed.

I was actually looking forward to doing the show at this point. You see, when I'm onstage, nothing else matters. The Recordkeeper, old Fezziwig, Scrooge's nephew Fred-- heck, even the spirits of the damned didn't have a problem with migraines. Acting would provide brief respite from the evils currently plaguing my body. However, the thought of what might happen during the periods of time I would be offstage, in the wings, frightened me.

I did my best to ignore the world as I lay on the couch. I drank some seltzer and ate a bite of a banana-- and found myself in the bathroom again, staring at the toilet. Then I returned to the couch.

It was showtime. Ovahchah! Curtain! Lights! This is it! We'll hit the heights! And, oh, what heights we'll hit! On with the show, this is WAIT.

Fearless Leader appeared and got everybody's attention, including mine.

"Well, strange as it might sound, only three people showed. What do we want to do?"

This couldn't be true. Three people?

I mumbled something about doing the show if we had to, but that I'd obviously be pretty grateful if we didn't.

And I wished with all my heart that I were elsewhere.

Everybody talked. I didn't pay attention to much of it, as one wouldn't usually pay attention to five people screaming loudly in a room lit by a small supernova. But I remember something about someone talking to the "audience," and asking if they wouldn't mind seeing it another night.

Ultimately, they were OK with that. And ultimately, we cancelled.

We'd cancelled an improv show once before, but a full-blown production? Never.

Sad that we had such a pathetic showing, but somehow wonderful as well.

I drove home as carefully as I could, stared at my computer screen for all of fifteen minutes, got violently ill, and collapsed into bed.

And I was finally embraced by sweet sleep.

First I ground planes by the force of sheer will. Now I cancel shows.

I wonder, if I set my mind to it, if I can move that blizzard that threatens to strand us in Saratoga tonight... ;)

I'm feeling all kinds of: drinking coffee and eating an english muffin, and loving every second of it
What I hear: laptop laptopping

19 tall tales or Tell me a story
duinlas From: duinlas Date: December 14th, 2003 07:43 am (UTC) (permalink)
it's obvious. Your migraine was caused because you were mentally cancelling the show.
ldy From: ldy Date: December 14th, 2003 01:49 pm (UTC) (permalink)
That's it. I'm rerouting the snowstorm to Arizona!
(Deleted comment)
ldy From: ldy Date: December 14th, 2003 01:50 pm (UTC) (permalink)
Aw. You're so sweet :)

Wow-- not even a headache? Never? Wow-- I'd say that's pretty amazing!!

I'm feeling much better today :)
muse From: muse Date: December 14th, 2003 08:04 am (UTC) (permalink)
Poor dear. You feel better soon, hear?
ldy From: ldy Date: December 14th, 2003 01:51 pm (UTC) (permalink)
*hugs!* Thank you, sweet mermaiden!
cloverbee From: cloverbee Date: December 14th, 2003 08:07 am (UTC) (permalink)
I hope you are feeling better now! Sometimes, I think fate steps in and takes care of things. At least you muddled through it and was prepared to go on with it despite being incapacitated. Kudos to you dearie, I couldn't have done it. I need someone to breathe for me when I have a migraine.
ldy From: ldy Date: December 14th, 2003 01:52 pm (UTC) (permalink)
I can't, with 100% accuracy, say that if I'd been hit with it before leaving the house (or had realized what was hitting me) I ever would have left. It was pretty horrible.

But I'm feeling much better now-- thanks for the good wishes!
sylvidoptera From: sylvidoptera Date: December 14th, 2003 09:33 am (UTC) (permalink)
I don't know how you did it... my migraines hit and my "Screw the world" meter hits overload. I can't move, so I don't. heh
ldy From: ldy Date: December 14th, 2003 01:53 pm (UTC) (permalink)
I don't know how I did it, either. And I'm kicking myself in the arse for driving both ways!
gamethyme From: gamethyme Date: December 14th, 2003 09:48 am (UTC) (permalink)
Sorry about that. Every so often, Feina needs to have her say. And I've learned that it's often best to let her do so and then quietly delete it before she posts. On rare occasions, she finds the Tab Key and follows it with the space bar. Or maneuvers the mouse just so ... so I set her pic when I see her starting to type.

It's easier than getting her off of the KB for any length of time.

I was going to post and tell you that you're an amazing person and I couldn't have gone through with that in the midst of a migraine. When I have a migraine start to show, I have to haul butt for home.

If you DO manage to move the blizzard, I'd love to have it here in Everett. We are (as we ever are) snowless. And I do so love the snow.
ldy From: ldy Date: December 14th, 2003 02:39 pm (UTC) (permalink)
I'm not getting any comments emailed to me, so I must have missed it. Feina can have her say here any time she'd like :)

Thank you for the thoughtful words. I'm not entirely certain how I made it there, or home, in one piece. But I'm sure glad I did!

I'll try to send some snow your way :) Goodness knows, we have enough of it!!
gamethyme From: gamethyme Date: December 14th, 2003 03:15 pm (UTC) (permalink)
Feina's favorite keys ar T, G, + and the enter key.

If you ever get a comment from me that looks like I fell asleep on the keyboard, it was all her fault.
mactavish From: mactavish Date: December 14th, 2003 10:26 am (UTC) (permalink)
I hope you feel better now!

I used to get migraines, back when I was taking the pill. It took me awhile to find that sensitivity to hormonal birth control was the culprit, and I've only gotten one in the thirteen or so years since I quit. But I remember it much like you described, with much barfing, and my sympathies are with you.
ldy From: ldy Date: December 14th, 2003 02:43 pm (UTC) (permalink)
Hm... I wonder if that's why I haven't had one in a very long time! I tend to be very sensitive to hormonal changes, as well. I'm having some problems with my own pill right now... but I think that switching back to the one I was on last year will help.

Have you considered trying the pill now that they have such low-dose formulations? I was a train wreck on ortho-novum, many many years back, but did much better on triphasil (and was doing well on mircette, though I think it's a little too low estrogen-wise and too high progestin-wise-- it seems to depress me, and messes with my cycle).

And I'm feeling a whole lot better-- thanks so much for asking!
mactavish From: mactavish Date: December 14th, 2003 03:48 pm (UTC) (permalink)
I don't have a good reason to take the pill right now, but if I did have a reason, I still might not. The thought of just one more migraine isn't worth the risk.
sunshine_two From: sunshine_two Date: December 14th, 2003 10:57 am (UTC) (permalink)
You're definitely talented ;)
ldy From: ldy Date: December 14th, 2003 02:44 pm (UTC) (permalink)
I'm going to add "driving under the influence of a migraine" to my resume, and hope the authorities don't haul me in for it ;)
oonie From: oonie Date: December 14th, 2003 12:02 pm (UTC) (permalink)
you're a trooper ma'am. i haven't had a migraine in years but from what i recall, wild horses couldn't have dragged me out unless i was head to the ER for a shot of Imatrix, let alone even attempt to drive.

i certainly do hope you're feeling better today
ldy From: ldy Date: December 14th, 2003 02:46 pm (UTC) (permalink)
I don't know if I would have made it out the door if it had hit me earlier. It didn't really slam me to the wall until I was on my way there-- a migraine was the LAST thing I was expecting! Nobody expects the Spanish inquisition migraine imposition!

And I'm feeling a WHOLE lot better, thanks for the good wishes :) I felt a little faint after taking my shower, but am hardly the worse for wear right now.
19 tall tales or Tell me a story