March 20th, 2002

moon

Permission granted/what you call "plagiarism"/is merely sharing :)

Copied shamelessly (and with permission) from pageeater's journal :) (And later adjusted and added, because I'm such a stickler for accuracy, and a glutton for punishment!)

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In Japan, they have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with Haiku poetry messages. Haiku poetry has strict construction rules: Each poem has only 17 syllables; 5 syllables in the first line, 7 in the second line, 5 in the third line. They are used to communicate a
timeless message, often achieving a wistful, yearning and powerful insight through extreme brevity.

Here are 16 actual error messages from Japan. Below, the essence of Zen.

Your file was so big.
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.

The Web site you seek
Cannot be located, but
Countless more exist.

Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.

Program aborting:
Close all that you have worked on.
You ask far too much.

Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.

Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.

First snow, then silence.
This thousand-dollar screen dies
So beautifully.

With searching comes loss
And the presence of absence:
"My Novel" not found.
The Tao that is seen
Is not the true Tao until
You bring fresh toner.

Stay the patient course.
Of little worth is your ire.
The network is down.

A crash reduces
Your expensive computer
To a simple stone.

Three things are certain:
Death, taxes and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.

You step in the stream,
But the water has moved on.
This page is not here.

Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.

Having been erased,
The document you're seeking
Must now be retyped.

Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.


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Now, following are the winners of a contest from Salon.

Three things are certain:
Death, taxes, and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.
-- David Dixon

Everything is gone;
Your life's work has been destroyed.
Squeeze trigger (yes/no)?
-- David Carlson

I'm sorry, there's -- um --
insufficient -- what's-it-called?
The term eludes me ...
-- Owen Mathews

Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.
-- Peter Rothman

Seeing my great fault
Through darkening blue windows
I begin again
-- Chris Walsh

The code was willing,
It considered your request,
But the chips were weak.
-- Barry L. Brumitt

Printer not ready.
Could be a fatal error.
Have a pen handy?
-- Pat Davis

A file that big?
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.
-- David J. Liszewski

Errors have occurred.
We won't tell you where or why.
Lazy programmers.
-- Charlie Gibbs

Server's poor response
Not quick enough for browser.
Timed out, plum blossom.
-- Rik Jespersen

Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.
-- Suzie Wagner

Login incorrect.
Only perfect spellers may
enter this system.
-- Jason Axley

This site has been moved.
We'd tell you where, but then we'd
have to delete you.
-- Charles Matthews

wind catches lily
scatt'ring petals to the wind:
segmentation fault
-- Nick Sweeney

ABORTED effort:
Close all that you have.
You ask way too much.
-- Mike Hagler

First snow, then silence.
This thousand dollar screen dies
so beautifully.
-- Simon Firth
With searching comes loss
and the presence of absence:
"My Novel" not found.
-- Howard Korder

The Tao that is seen
Is not the true Tao, until
You bring fresh toner.
-- Bill Torcaso

The Web site you seek
cannot be located but
endless others exist
-- Joy Rothke

Stay the patient course
Of little worth is your ire
The network is down
-- David Ansel

A crash reduces
your expensive computer
to a simple stone.
-- James Lopez

There is a chasm
of carbon and silicon
the software can't bridge
-- Rahul Sonnad

Yesterday it worked
Today it is not working
Windows is like that
-- Margaret Segall

To have no errors
Would be life without meaning
No struggle, no joy
-- Brian M. Porter

You step in the stream,
but the water has moved on.
This page is not here.
-- Cass Whittington

No keyboard present
Hit F1 to continue
Zen engineering?
-- Jim Griffith

Hal, open the file
Hal, open the damn file, Hal
open the, please Hal
-- Jennifer Jo Lane

Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.
-- Francis Heaney

Having been erased,
The document you're seeking
Must now be retyped.
-- Judy Birmingham

The ten thousand things
How long do any persist?
Netscape, too, has gone.
-- Jason Willoughby

Rather than a beep
Or a rude error message,
These words: "File not found."
-- Len Dvorkin

Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
-- Ian Hughes


Very similar, although some are quite different.

Whether the email rune received was a deliberate hoax, or merely the result of a child's game of operator is unknown. But I think some of the ones there are even more elegant than Salon's winners.

Even email hoax
not immune to the beauty,
the truth that is zen


Happy Spring, Moonpies :)

First of Spring my ass/It's snowing like crazy here/Nature is laughing
  • Current Music
    Pat Metheny Grou - Road to You - Half-Life of Absolution
rubbah and horns

*EXPLETIVES!*

Well. I journaled for an entire hour, and Mr. Computer decided that crashing would be a great idea. Let's see how long it takes me to put together somewhat resembling the original. It's 10p now... ready, set...

First of all,
Happy Birthday
happymrlocust!

I know I'm rather late, being in a different timezone and all... my apologies. You are such a talented artist, and a butterfly who is only beginning to take wing, much like me. I wish you every happiness this year, and always *hugs*


And to the rest of ya:
Happy Spring?!!

We got some serious snow today... I so wish I had taken photos. It was beautiful. But I worked late today, and raced home to take a nap because I was just SO wiped out and achy. Which reminds me...

Note to self:
Ldy, you've had whiplash at least once or twice.
Headbanging to Metallica at karaoke is a BAD IDEA!!!a


And the music goes 'round and around; Wooooooooooooo; and it comes out here

I'm in much better spirits today than yesterday :) Thank you to everyone who told me a naughty placeb in the public poll and "something saucy" in the private poll yesterday! Hidden amongst the marinara, worchestershire, picante and hollendaise, there were some really, uhm, saucy items! (Yum!) And no, I'm not sharing ;)

I came to the conclusion that the act of wearing rhinestone sneakers to work didn't improve my mood only because I didn't take the sparklies far enough. So, for karaoke, I wore tight stretchy black sparkly jeans, a too-smallc black shirt with a sparkly dragon on it, motorcycle boots, a studded leather belt, and a pinkish-purpley cardigand.

The combined efforts of the hiphuggers and the shirt to keep a half-inch of my midriff exposed had me doing the Star-Trek Tunic-Tuck™ half the evening; I suppose I'll have to work at not doing that :P

Most of our usual group wasn't going, and the last few Tuesday nights had been desolate, so I was a wee bit concerned that turnout tonight would be so minimal that the karaoke service would stop coming to perform. But such was not the case! People I hadn't seen in weeks and a good number of new people showed up, and the DJ brought some of his colleagues and friends along as well.

What's especially nifty is that, on the way there, I foretold the return of someone we hadn't seen in ages. How I knew is beyond me, but he showed up shortly after we did.e :D

I sang No Doubt's "Just a Girl," Cher's "Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves," and Roberta Flack's "Killing Me Softly." I'd never sang the last one before, and my voice wasn't exactly in the state I wanted it to be, but all three songs came off exceptionally well, I think. E mentioned that I could improve a bit if I focused on bringing the noise to the front of my mouth. It took me ages to learn how to use my voice correctly-- that is, using my diaphragm and not my throat-- now I have to work on getting the song all the way from my diaphragm to the tip of my teeth before letting it go. Not easy... but I like a challenge :)

Niftiness (and no, I'm not talking about voodoolimbo, as nifty as he is!):

circlek posted this nifty thing, and it was just way too nifty not to cross-post to lj_nifty.

Now that the directory's back up, paid users can see all their friends' default userpics in one place:

My friends' default userpics

Simply replace "ldy" with your username, and pagesize with your preference!

Warm Welcomeses!
emiliejolie
tracylee
mommymom
Wow-- three truly amazing and talented women! Welcome!

Well, it only took fifty minutes, and that includes time spent responding to other things that popped into my mailbox, adding a footnotes and other miscellaneous things that weren't in the original, and proofing. I'm guessing a half-hour, tops. Could've been worse, I s'pose! Hope I didn't forget anything important (like any of my rambling was all that important in the first place!).

Goodnight, moonpies!f *hugs*

11:20PM Addendum-- Just received from Yahoo:
Important service announcement regarding your POP3 or Mail Forwarding service: Effective April 24, 2002, Yahoo! Mail will no longer provide free POP3 Access or Auto Mail Forwarding to Yahoo! Delivers subscribers.

Just so you know (hey-- I get to end the entry with expletives! How bleeping appropriate! ;P)

a Unfortunately, my tummy seems to think that my ritual Wednesday chili lunch, prepared with love and extra cheddar just-the-way-I-likes-it is also probably becoming a bad idea. *sigh*
b Heh! ;)
c In my opinion; though from what I understand, it is the style these days.
d For contrast, of course! Imagine a curvaceous red-headed Mr. Rogers on crack applying for the Hell's Angels. ;)
e Some of our friends aren't too fond of this other person, and tried to blame his appearance on me, as though I pulled him out of a hat or something. Don't shoot the messenger!
f Please substitute "Good morning," "Good afternoon," or "Good evening" if your timezone so suggests it!
k For darkbloom:
Age-old koan answered
"The sound of one hand clapping:"
Porn download complete!